Friday, August 21, 2009

Quotes for the Week #36

"Women can do anything men can do... except math, chess, running, jumping, lifting stuff, fixing things, making money, hockey, surfing, driving, making decisions, being tall, taking out the garbage, tipping, fishing, being funny... on purpose, reading a map, listening to good bands, writing, running the country, inventing anything important, or being fun to hang out with." - Daniel Tosh

"So, in just sixteen months, during which Glenn Beck moved from CNN to Fox, you can chart the incredible progress of health care in this country... I'll tell you what really doesn't speak well of our health care system, that in those sixteen months, the hole that they stitched up in Glenn Beck's ass hasn't healed enough for him to stop talking out of it." - Jon Stewart

"I always thought that record would stand until it was broken." - Yogi Berra

"The Steiner Brothers were a household name. Harlem Heat were a household name. But, you know what? Garbage is a household name also, and just like garbage, you're both getting old and you stink." - Brother Ray

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